


you and me, even after everything

by whiskeyandguns



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Force-Feeding, M/M, Mentor/Protégé, Mildly Dubious Consent, Vampire Bites, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-21
Updated: 2017-12-21
Packaged: 2019-02-17 21:52:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13086108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whiskeyandguns/pseuds/whiskeyandguns
Summary: The hunger reached deep into his soul. It wracked through his veins, left them burning and dry, feeling too small and too tight. His eyelids stuck, his lips were dry and cracked, his mouth felt like the desert he had grown up in.--Jesse got caught. Jesse got turned. Jesse should have known better to confront his undead ex-commander.





	you and me, even after everything

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nukawinter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nukawinter/gifts).



> Merry Christmas, Nuka <3 You're such an inspiration in this fandom! It's always fun to get to write some vampires, hopefully this is something like what you were looking for!  
> ___
> 
> Title from "We're In This Together Now" by Nine Inch Nails, which I also shamefully ripped a line of dialogue from because I really couldn't resist.

Jesse was in pain, sulking, hurting and hungry. The hunger felt like it was alive, vibrating under his skin, a monster waiting to be unleashed. But it was still a weak monster, something he had been trying to keep locked up. There had been plenty of times in his human life that he had gone hungry, when the pain of an empty stomach kept him from sleeping. He could cope with hunger, probably better than most. It had been a long, long time since he had been hungry though--since before Deadlock, since before Gabe had saved him from a jail cell.

 

Well. Jesse didn’t know that he would qualify what Gabe had done this time as “saving him.”

 

It was different from when he had been human. The hunger reached deep into his soul. It wracked through his veins, left them burning and dry, feeling too small and too tight. His eyelids stuck, his lips were dry and cracked, his mouth felt like the desert he had grown up in. Still, Jesse remained obstinate, curled in the corner of Gabe’s den. He could have left, he had had plenty of opportunities, but he wouldn't. There were too many things keeping him here.

 

“Quit sulking.” Gabe's voice sounded harsh on Jesse’s ears, it was rougher and deeper than what he had known before, in their human lives. To his new enhanced senses, it was a double assault, grating on him and making him want to buck up even further. He missed the honey smooth voice of his commander, the voice that had haunted his dreams in the time between when he lost him and when Gabe found him again. Jesse could tell by his tone that Gabe wasn’t trying to be cruel, it was just his voice sounded so different. It was hard to get used to.

 

“Ain't sulking,” Jesse replied shortly, unwilling to say more. His throat was sore from, his mouth and gums _ached_ as his teeth grew, reshaping and refitting themselves. Gabe said it would be over soon, that he would get used to the slide and sharpness of his new teeth. As it was, the new shapes cut his own tongue, they made talking difficult and painful, especially since he hadn’t fed.

 

“Seems like it to me.” It had been nearly a month since he had turned Jesse, but Jesse had only fed a handful of times since then. No matter how much Gabe insisted that it would be over more quickly, that Jesse would feel stronger, heal more quickly, and settle into his body sooner if he would just _feed_ , he still refused.

 

Just the other night, Gabe had gone to feed and had come back, warm and flushed and smelling wonderful. Jesse twitched with the effort to restrain himself, even though he was only picking up on the leftover scent from Gabe feeding. Jesse had done everything he could to keep himself reigned in though--as good as Gabe smelled, high off of feeding and the adrenaline rush from it, Jesse wouldn’t go out with him.

 

He wasn't afraid of feeding--but he was afraid of killing. He knew Gabe didn't kill everyone he fed from, but he worried he wouldn't be able to stop himself. It had always been easier for him to kill than it had been for Gabe, anyway. Gabe used to avoid it whenever possible. He didn’t hesitate, but if a Blackwatch mission didn’t have to end in someone’s death, it wouldn’t. Jesse, on the other hand, had learned early on that hesitation would only end in disaster, it was better not the shy away from a kill. Jesse never hesitated.  At least, not until he had faced Gabe in battle. And look what that had resulted in? He could have saved them both from this miserable existence if he hadn’t hesitated.

 

“Come here,” Gabe said, commanding and compelling Jesse to move. Jesse felt it tugging at his brain, urging him to move and making the itch under his skin feel even worse. Gabe had only compelled him a few times--each time it was as uncomfortable as the last. It was another thing about Jesse’s new existence that made his skin crawl. He didn’t like anyone having that power over him, not even Gabe.

 

Jesse just glared at Gabe, refusing to move an inch or say another word, even if that was only to save himself from the pain of actually speaking. Even though it only resulted in the itch in his skin growing worse and worse as the urge to obey the compulsion increased.

 

 “I'm not going to watch you starve to death kid. Come here.” Gabriel gave Jesse one more chance to comply, waiting and watching impatiently as Jesse remained steadfast and refused to move. When he grew tired of waiting he stormed across the room, grabbing Jesse and yanking him out of his protective position.

 

“Fuck you, can't make me do anything,” Jesse hissed, annoyed at Gabe's attempt at using force. He didn't have the energy to fight him though, and Gabe's grip on him was absolute as he pulled him over to the bed that they might have shared if Jesse hadn’t been avoiding him so stubbornly

 

“I'm not going to make you,” he replied, but he was pulling Jesse up against him, holding him, in a mockery of the type of embrace they had shared when they were both human. When it had just been their own blood and their own life forces keeping them animated, giving them strength instead of some _curse_ making a mockery of human life.

 

But their closeness was familiar and Gabriel was warm and flushed from feeding. Against Jesse’s cold, dead skin it was the most comforting thing he had felt since he was turned--maybe even since before that if he was being honest. Maybe since the last time he had slept next to Gabe, before pulling himself out of the bed and walking away from it all. Jesse felt so _weak_. Pressed up against Gabe like this, he couldn't help but press in closer wrap an arm around him and nuzzle into his neck chasing the scent of blood in him. He had forgotten how nice it felt to be pressed up against Gabe, he had scarcely let himself enjoy the fact that Gabe was _here_ , even if Jesse couldn’t quite call him alive.

 

“There you go,” Gabe's rough voice was as soothing as it could be, softer and calming as he held Jesse in. His grip was relaxed, but Jesse wasn't fooled--he knew that were he to try to move back, Gabe's iron grip would keep him close no matter how much he struggled. “I know it hurts, feeding will make it better.”

 

“Can't.” Jesse replied, desperate even as he pressed his mouth over the vein in Gabe’s throat. “I can’t do this.”

 

“I just need you to feed a little. I'll let you fuck off and sulk after but I can’t watch you starve. I don’t want to make you.” There was the implied threat. The last time Jesse had fed reluctantly, but willingly, but the time before that Gabe had cut into his own wrist, held Jesse down forced his jaw open with his free hand and made him feed. It went on for so long that by the end, Jesse was warm, sated, and flushed for the first time since he had been alive, but it Gabe had to go back out to feed a second time. If Gabe was at his wits end, then Jesse was not eager to repeat that experience. As nice as being full had felt, the loss of control was grating.

 

“Hurts too much,” he complained weakly as he tried to line his sharpened canines up to bite. He tried applying pressure, but the pain felt paradoxically sharp and dull, shooting through his gums and his bones and making everything _throb_. If Jesse wasn’t so conflicted, it might have been easier to keep the pressure even despite it, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Gabriel's skin was more difficult to puncture than a human’s was anyway. Once Jesse’s fangs were fully formed it wouldn’t present a problem, but he was so weak from barely feeding that he was settling so slowly.

 

“I'm not gonna help you again,” Gabriel said, exasperated, “You need to learn to do it on your own. It will feel better right after you bite.”

 

Jesse nearly whined. With Gabe this close it was harder to resist the draw in the first place, but it _hurt_ , dammit. Jesse was no stranger to pain, but it felt like he had been oversensitive and overstimulated since Gabriel had first bitten him and it had only gotten worse since he was turned. He wanted to tune everything out, not dial it up to ten.

 

“Bite me.” Gabe finally ordered, pushing his hand into Jesse’s hair and pressing him to the column of his throat. “Now.”

 

This time, Jesse didn't resist the compulsion. His fangs were young, still not as sharp as they would grow to be, so the bite wasn't as smooth as it would be soon. He did whine, shuddering from the pain even as Gabriel kept him pressed in. But _oh,_ once he had bitten into him and the blood _flowed_.

 

It was warm and sweet on Jesse’s tongue--flooding his senses with taste and smell. The sharp pangs of hunger seized Jesse again, he dug his fingers into muscle and bit Gabe again, this time deeper and with less hesitation. Like a man possessed, he clung to Gabe and shivered as he felt his body grow just slightly warmer. He had been so cold, the warmth had long since faded away from the last time he fed.

 

“Perfect,” Gabe said, a little strained as Jesse worked against his throat. “Just like that, so good for me.” He brushed his fingers through Jesse’s hair, almost gentle as he avoided pulling at the tangles, moving to push Jesse’s hair back from his face. His hand was gentle, almost soft as he ran it through his hair again, stroking gently, trying to soothe Jesse and lull him into something resembling peace.

 

Jesse keened at the praise as he drank. It was easier to calm down after the initial rush of blood into his system, easier to loosen his fingers from the death grip he had on Gabe. He wasn’t going anywhere though, Gabe’s arms were still tight around him, keeping him pulled in close.

 

Jesse drank for what felt like ages before he could finally bring himself to pull away from Gabe, resting his forehead on Gabe’s shoulder. The silence between them was thick, both of them waiting for the other to say something.

 

“I want to hate you for this a lot more than I actually do,” Jesse muttered, finally pulling back to look at Gabe directly.

 

“You’re already so much stronger.” Gabe replied, leaning in to kiss Jesse softly. It was soft and warm, a little electric. It reminded Jesse of being _alive_. “I’m stronger for having you, too. We’re in this together now. Nothing can stop us.”

 

Jesse was the one to kiss Gabe this time, relaxing into the sensation, embracing the overstimulation for the sake of something familiar and comforting.

 

“You’re gonna have to do an awful lot to make up for this. I ain’t forgiving you so easy.”

 

“I know. I’ll do whatever it takes.”

 

“You say that now. You gonna stop me when I’m half crazy trying to rip someone’s throat out.”

 

“I’m not going to let you do anything you’d regret. This isn’t all bad, Jesse. Think about it, we can go back to what we were doing before. You and me, we can pick up where we left off--get back at the bad guys.”

 

“I think your definition of bad guys is a little different from mine now.” Jesse knew all about Gabe’s more recent activities, of course. It was why he had confronted him in the first place. It was how he had ended up like _this_. He could have let Gabe keep going on and he might still be human.

 

“Don’t worry, I’m going to explain everything. I didn’t want to push you further away while you were weak. I’m going to explain it, I just need you to trust me.”

 

“I trust who you used to be. Don’t know much about what’s standing in front of me now.”

 

“That’s fair. I’ll earn it back, Jess. I already said I’ll do whatever it takes. I mean it--this isn’t as much of a curse as you think it is. We can do good things. That six-shooter trick of yours? Think about how much stronger it can be once you have full control.”

 

Jesse didn’t _want_ to think about that, it just made him uneasy again. Put together with his knowledge of Gabe’s ceaseless hunt for revenge? It made him nervous. What if Gabe had been counting on Jesse to go crazed with hunger, turn him into a weapon?

It wouldn’t be the first time Gabe had enlisted him for a cause so much bigger than he had even anticipated.

 

Yet, Jesse had come around before. It had taken time, but Gabe had proven time and time again that he could be trusted. He had always treated Jesse with respect and gratitude, given praise freely and given independence whenever he could, within the bounds of his Blackwatch contract.

 

“That’s later. We’re starting from scratch, Gabe. I’ll kiss you and I’ll love you like I did before, but you gotta earn my trust again, like you did before. That’s the deal.”

 

“Seems fair. Think I can hold to that.”

 

“Gotta do better than think.”

 

Gabe rolled his eyes, a little fondly, pulling Jesse in close again. “I love you. I _will_ do what it takes to earn your trust back. I promise.”

 

“Good, I’m counting on it.”

 

Jesse was exhausted. Everything was bright and loud and sharp, but it was also warm. It wasn’t perfect, but few things in his life ever had been. He didn’t know if he’d ever get used to this, but he could work with it. He could work with Gabe’s promise, he needed to believe it.

 

 

 

 


End file.
